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Xtreme Measures – May 29th
Wasting little time, we find out that Bill DeMott will be our special guest commissioner for the evening. He walked out to make sure we were ready for the show, and the full audience assured him that they were.
Match #1
Cedric the Hitman, Ray Basura, Moshpit Mike
vs
Shadow Fox, Lucha Star, Rellik
I’m constantly wowed by Shadow Fox and Lucha Star. Such small packages (I mean physique, don’t get excited) that deliver such power when they really dig deep. To see them function as a tag team unit was exquisite. Moshpit and Basura teamed up like they had done it a million times before. These were the primary characters throughout the entire match, with appearances here and there from Cedric. But Rellik jumped in to clean up, making the crowd erupt. But a hush fell when his sights turned to his own partners, destroying first Shadow Fox, then Lucha Star. This has left me to conclude that no team won.
Winner: Rellik
Match #2
Kyle Hawk
vs
Mike Da-Lite
I’m actually quite appalled with this match. Not because of either man, but with the damn fans. There were a lot of new kids at the arena, which was great. But check your WWE obsessions at the door. These two put on one hell of a match. And how does the crowd thank them? Going to the bathroom, buying another beer, zoning out. Such a shame. But what I liked best about this match, was how Hawk and Da-Lite slapped the audience in the face and forced them to take notice. And god damn it, that woke them up. Hawk looked better than he has in recent months, which was still pretty good. And Da-Lite was a surprising delight (see what I did there?).
Winner: Kyle Hawk
Match #3
Andrew Hellman
vs
Cutler Wright
Number One Contender’s Match
Time for another broken record. I love Andrew Hellman. He is a joy to watch in the ring for a number of reasons. He displays power in his technical skill which, judging by the “smurf” chants that have become borderline annoying, makes you forget about his size. But also, he always seems to have a story to tell. You could feel that he really wanted to win this match, to gain a shot at the Heavyweight title. Which, he more than earned.
Winner: Andrew Hellman
Match #4
Steve Osborne, Devin Sparks, and Woodrow Santanelli
The Business
vs
Tyson Tyler and Johnny Stamboli
The Network
One of the most anticipated matches of the evening, this was. It was a little all over the place to begin, but picked up quickly enough. One thing I must say…I adore Steve. I do. But he needs to learn how to slap someone without looking like a Diva. Some of the key players looked pretty weak, but altogether it was infatuating. Woody was slid a chair, and used it when the ref’s back was turned. But noticing the impact and the item, Woody found himself eliminated. Quickly after, Stamboli got rid of Sparks. So that left Steve, and the Network. He rolled out of the ring, marching up the ramp claiming the match wasn’t worth it. But then, a wild Robocop appeared! He was thrown back in the ring, where he begged for mercy, which the Network showed none of. The GFY returned with a vengeance, launching Steve into a hard table. With all elements involved, I probably have the fondest memories of this match.
Winner(s): Tyson Tyler and Johnny Stamboli
Match #5
Rexx Reed
vs
Willie Mack
For the vacant Elite Championship
Let me start this by saying that Bill DeMott himself described this match as “great” and “how two big guys should work.” The two were very evenly matched the entire way, trading control and wowing the crowd. Mack is one of the first that I have come across that has been hyped into oblivion, and lived up to it. And Reed has been so immensely impressive, that it makes me wish that EXW could see more of him. I honestly wasn’t sure who would win, or should win. But was delighted either way.
Winner: Willie Mack
Tommy Dreamer’s music cued up, but he did not emerge. Instead, his opponent Dom Vitalli did, which bewildered the crowd. Dom waited patiently, but who should walk out next? Bill DeMott.
He apparently has a trick up his sleeve. It is implied that Dom did something to prevent Dreamer from arriving, so DeMott found a new challenger. Whether you know him as Giant Bernard, or A-Train, he appeared anyway.
Match #6
Dom Vitalli
vs
Giant Bernard
World Heavyweight Championship
I’ll save you some time here. Dom didn’t want to face the giant. The Freak Squad ran out. Team Elite runs out. DQ. Over. Now, on to the real steak and potatoes of the evening.
DeMott walks out once more, claiming that it won’t go down like that. So, we have a 6-man tag team!
Match #7
Dom Vitalli, Frenchy Riviera, and Gabriel Gallo
The Freak Squad
vs
Derick Neikirk, Val Venis, and Giant Bernard
Tag Team Championship
Lots of controversy with this match, but let’s talk about the actual match. This was a true display of what a good match should be. All six knocked me on my ass when the bell rung. I felt that familiar rush of adrenaline as my eyes widened and my breath caught in my chest. No matter where you turned, it was marvelous. The tags were quick, the spots were hard, and the fans took it all in with rowdy approval. Overall, I thought it was an excellent main event.
Now. The elephant in the room. To sum up, Giant Bernard turned on everyone, including his own tag team partners, to win on his own, and take the tag team titles for himself. Sound familiar? Most people are complaining about the déjà vu finish. Honestly, I almost completely forgot about the opening match’s finish. Blame it on the beer, blame it on the horrible memory. But I thought there was enough in between that anyone not scrutinizing each move wouldn’t think about. In hindsight, was it a little redundant? Sure. But in my opinion, it was done well in both matches.
After the attack, Giant Bernard wanted to continue, but DeMott wouldn’t let that happen. He ran out, forcing Bernard to leave. He then helped each of the five men to their feet. But the greatest part was, he ended the show with a very powerful, “EXW, you guys are the best.”
So, Giant Bernard walks out as the tag team champion…with himself. Willie Mack is crowned the new Elite Champion. The Freak Squad’s cracks are starting to show. The boys will reconvene on June 7th at Toby Keith’s I Love This Bar and Grill. And you bet your ass I’ll be there.
