FWF RESULTS FROM SOUTH AMBOY, NJ 5/4/2013 Funkdafied Wrestling Federation returned to South Amboy, NJ's Cardinal McCarrick High School Gym on Saturday night May 4th. The turnout was definitely below expectations, a very light Saturday night crowd, but those who came witnessed some excellent action, and those who did not definitely missed out! Before the show, WWE Hall of Fame legend "El Matador" Tito Santana posed for pictures with the fans. Former NWS/FWF wrestler, back from active duty in the U.S. Navy, Nate Mustang was the flag bearer. In the opening contest, Kevin Knight defeated Roman Zachary, who was returning to FWF after many years. Roman fought out of a powerbomb attempt by Knight and went for a full-nelsonslam, but Knight shoved him off into the corner, then rolled him up from behind with a handful of tights and got the victory. In a tag-team match, Mike Massacre & Kyle "The Beast" Winant defeated Smokehouse & "The White Urkel" B. Fehrm. Fehrm endured several minutes of double-teaming before he superkicked Massacre and tagged in Smokehouse who smoked out both opponents until The Beast tossed him out of the ring from the apron. Fehrm hit a Nerd Cutter on The Beast from along the apron, smashing him to the floor, but then Massacre hit an overhead German Suplex on Fehrm and held him down for the 1-2-3. In a one-on-one encounter, The Jersey Kidd defeated "Low-Life" Louis Ramos. After a furious match, Ramos fought out of an Octupus submission hold by Kidd, pummeled him, then hit a flying leg drop from the top rope, but only got a two-count. Ramos went for an F-5, but Kidd fought out, shoved Ramos into the corner, then hit a running clothesline followed his "Jersey Leg Sweep" DDT finisher for the three-count. The 2 Rude Dudes ("Corrupted" Corey Havoc & "Rampage" Rogers), with manager Destiny, became the three-time FWF Tag-Team Champions by defeating current champions The Down Boys ("Tuff" Tony Scorace & Steve "The Gipper" Gipke). Despite a valiant effort by Scorace and Gipke, and some miscues by Havoc and Rampage, Rampage DDT'd Tuff Tony and pinned him to win the belts. During intermission, WWE Hall of Fame legend "El Matador" Tito Santana posed for more pictures in the ring with the fans. In a bonus match, "Jersey Shore Lunatic" Slayer defeated "Retro Rocker" Rikki Roxx. The match began on a friendly note between two apparent fan favorites, but after the two high-fived each other, Slayer turned his back and Retro hit him from behind, earning boos from the fans as he tore into Slayer. Retro pounded on Slayer inside and outside the ring, but could not put him away. Retro missed a running leg drop on Slayer, turrning the tide, and Slayer took down Retro with a neckbreaker DDT in the corner and pinned him 1-2-3. In a brutal one-on-one match, Eric Corvis defeated Lightning Bolt Johnson. Corvis jumped Johnson almost immediately and took the match outside, slamming each other into the ring post, ring steps, and the gym walls. The two finally got their match back in the ring and fought back and forth. Corvis missed a flying splash on Johnson. Johnson hit Corvis with a couple of big boots, then smashed Corvis face-first into the mat from a backslide position, but could only get a two count. Johnson had Corvis in a full-nelson hold, but Corvis back-kicked Johnson low in his groin when the referee wasn't looking, then covered the incapacitated Johnson and got the three-count. In the first of two main event matches, and a match that will be talked about for a long time, FWF Cruiserweight Champion Fast Eddie Franken retained his title in a Triple-Threat Ladder Match against former champion and current FWF owner "Mr. Entertainment" J.D. Smoothie and "Stylin'" Brandon Kirk. Smoothie got in Eddie's face right away, but Brandon brought a ladder into play and made the first attempt to climb to the title, but Smoothie tipped the ladder, knocking Brandon to the floor, and then went after Eddie, bringing in a second ladder and slamming Eddie on top of it. Eddie reversed things and tossed Smoothie into the ladder after he had propped it up in the corner, then planted it in the center of the ring and began to climb towards the belt. Brandon returned to the ring and hit Eddie with a chair, knocking him off the ladder, and both he and Smoothie tried to climb the ladder, trading punches at the top and eventually knocking each other to the floor. Eddie returned to the ring with a chair and leveled both Smoothie and Brandon, then began climbing the ladder himself. But in an incredible move, Smoothie spring-boarded over the top rope and drop-kicked the ladder, splitting one of its main legs in two and knocking it and Eddie to the mat. Brandon returned to the ring but Smoothie wedged a chair in the corner and tossed Brandon into it. Smoothie attacked Eddie on the outside with the chair, then he and Brandon began fighting all over the gym, pummling each other with garbage cans and anything else within reach. As they fought towards the back balcony, Eddie appeared at the top of the balcony, and in one of the craziest moves ever witnessed in FWF, Eddie leaped from the balcony and took out Smoothie and Brandon (and the Security Staff as well!). The fans roared their appreciation with an ECW-style ""F-W-F... F-W-F!" chant. Eddie and Smoothie battled back into the ring, and Eddie smashed Smoothie into the remaining ladder on the mat with a Spaghetti neckbreaker, planted a wooden door in one corner, then placed the ladder in the middle of the ring and began climbing. Brandon limped back into the ring and climbed up the other side, trading punches with Eddie until the ladder buckled and they both fell to the mat. Brandon and Smoothie tried to toss each other into the wooden door in the corner, but Eddie charged at them both and speared them both through the door! With the referee steadying the buckled ladder, Eddie climbed to the top unopposed and retrieved the FWF Cruiserweight Belt, retaining the title. Cardinal McCarrick High School Vice-Principal Marjorie "Marge-In-Charge" Bryner was introduced as the Guest Ring Announcer for the final match. In the second of the two main event matches, WWE Hall Of Fame legend "El Matador" Tito Santana defeated "The Cold-Hearted Playa" Danny Demanto, with his manager Destiny. Despite Demanto's assertion that tonight was his night to finally defeat Tito (whom he had never defeated in their previous FWF meetings), the veteran Tito kept Demanto at bay early on. Demanto got in some offense on Tito, and had him down on the mat in a chinlock sleeperhold, but Tito fought his way to his feet and took Demanto down. Tito went for his Flying Burrito finisher, but Destiny grabbed his leg from the outside to stop the momentum. As Tito grabbed at Destiny, Demanto went to attack Tito from behind, but Tito obviously had seen this trick before and was ready, as he decked Demanto and knocked him flat on the mat, then locked in a Figure-Four Leglock, and Demanto immediately tapped out.