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KNOCKED OUT? - THE CYNICAL VIEW LOOKS AT THE TNA'S WOMEN'S DIVISION

“Knocked Out???”

Welcome back to “The Cynical View”, where I’m currently in shock about just how wrong I was, when It came to TNA: Bound For Glory. Sadly, due to unforeseen circumstances ( myself being dumb actually), my column was not posted prior to the Pay Per View. Now I know that may well disappointment many… well okay… one or two people, but anyways, in a nutshell, this is what I had to say:

Well I was wrong. Whilst no means perfect, by any means, this was one of TNA’s best efforts in a long while. An exciting X-Division title match, a great opener, a really good main event (although yes, tarnished by a ludicrous final few minutes), and the match of the night, Joe vs. Christian, made for a value for money show. But that’s not what I’m here to talk about. I want to address something that I see as altogether more important than that one PPV- TNA’s Women’s division (or “Knockouts” which they call it).

I didn’t think I’d see it, If I’m perfectly honest. When Christy Hemme unintentionally turned herself heel by presenting her cod-feminist ideas a few months back, I thought it was horrific booking. Thus, as rumours swirled around that TNA would be instigating their own ladies division was a glum prospect. After all, the said division consisted entirely of Jackie Moore, and Gail Kim. As the WWE has proven, you cannot build a women’s division around just two women (even though they constantly re-do the same two-person feud over and over…). Apart from those two we had SoCalVal, who is solely an announcer, an Ms. Brooks, a talented lady whose role was sadly limited to flashing as much cleavage as possible. Meanwhile, Hemme was a woman who stood up for herself against the bigoted male-folk. In a nasty twist, it was the fans who turned on her after she defended herself against VKM, and gave them a mouthful of what she had on her mind. Was this a situation created by the awful booking (and poor execution in all fairness- Hemme cut some terrible promos), or because the majority of wrestling fans watching are a bunch of infantile sexist cave-men? I fear it’s a mixture of the two.

In general, Women’s wrestling is not over in the US. It just isn’t. Part of this is of course, the atrocious booking of women in the WWE. McMahon was never, at point entirely committed to a ladies division, even though he had numerous opportunities throughout the 80’s and 90’s, and it did show promise every so often. But in Japan Joshi was huge, and he never really attempted to repeat it’s success. In the WWE, it’s first real push came in 98-99, with the rise in popularity of Sable. But Sable, as charismatic, and popular she was, and despite the fact that at one point, she really did work for it, wasn’t bought by the people for in-ring skills. Her success was based on her raunchy image, and the envelope-pushing material she was involved in. Sex always has sold. Thus, in 1999, as more women than ever were involved in the company, their profile was raised. The Women’s title became a frequent part of television, and their were actually feuds. As the year went on however, there were less ordinary matches, and more often, the women were involved in pudding matches, evening gown bouts, or the WWE’s favourite, Bra and Panties clashes. The result was, that fans became conditioned to expect this sort of nonsense from the women, rather than actual wrestling. It’s a problem that still exists today. Sadly, it’s easily justified to believe women’s wrestling is boring, and needs such accessories, when it in fact, usually is. Looking back through the WWE over the last few years, very, very few of the females produced decent matches. The simple reason? Most of them sucked. But this is because Vince McMahon has a habit of signing ladies who can’t wrestle, just because of how they look (this is obviously a problem with the guys too… but more so with the women), and pushing those who are willing to pose for playboy. Meaning, we have ended up with constant, repetitive bouts, that showcase women who look limited, unconvincing, and, yep, fake.

Right now, it’s so depressing to hear people talk about Candice, and how well she’s doing, and how much she’s improved, and how she “deserves” her role. She doesn’t. She needs to be taken out of the ring immediately. Candice does not have the experience to compete at that level. She’s so inexperienced, that she can only perform the most rudimentary of manoeuvres, or those that have been rehearsed over, and over again. Otherwise, the mixture of move-botching, and danger to her opponents, would be insane. The result? Boring, simplistic matches that look too rehearsed, leaving the fans wanting to look at her ass instead. She needs to be taken off TV, and trained, for months at least, to be sufficiently prepared to wrestle live on television. So whilst the girl may work hard, and may have improved (and she really has, I applaud her), she will not be good enough at this rate for a long time, during which we’ll have to endure substandard wrestling. There are other women out there who can wrestle, and wrestle well. They should be put on television, they should be re-educating the fans, in favour of the girls who are hot-shotted for being willing to take their tops off. Not Candice, Not Melina, and not Ashley, who was put on television to wrestle, only weeks after beginning to train. That just isn’t acceptable, and is how people get hurt (and in fact, is why she did break her leg, amongst other injuries).

The one notable deviant from the Stamford formula in recent times, has been Trish Stratus. Initially part of the company thanks to her looks, she eventually, through hard work, commitment to women’s wrestling, serious booking from the WWWE (who presented as a wrestler)and integrity, was able to produce entertaining match ups, based on the same fundamentals that lie behind male wrestling. Sure, the WWE has had a whole pile of other talents over the years, but none like Trish Stratus.

Victoria ( a supremely talented female worker, how has always been capable of good matches, and had a great character at one point. Thanks to her muscular physique, and perhaps being slightly older than some of the division, hasn’t been given a sustained push, or even role, since her initial debut feud in 2002. Is constantly jobbed to the Play-boy types in hype for the real feuds.)

Mickey James (really talented, but not entirely conventional looking beauty. Therefore she now plays a similar role to Victoria, jobbing to the heels designated to feud with the Barbie dolls)

Beth Phoenix (current champion. Large, muscular physique almost guarantees that she will be built up to drop the belt to the latest model-type come Wrestlemania).

Jazz ( great worker, could hold together great matches. Never had “the look” WWE wants you to associate with Women).

Molly (same as Jazz. In fact, the WWE made fat jokes about her ass, a disgrace considering she’s one of the few that promotes a positive body image).

Lita (genuinely exciting, over star, but a mixture of bad luck, and sloppiness seemed to cause her to lose her in-ring confidence. Lacked Trish’s in-ring coherence, but was a marketable star for a couple of years).

And there have been a bunch of others who have been talented enough to compete in serious matches. In contrast to these girls, Trish, from the moment she committed herself as a wrestler, was pushed as a competitive athlete. She wasn’t a novelty, she was booked as a “wrestler”, and at one time, as a marquee star for the company. But the WWE wouldn’t push her against opponents who were pretty girls and talented, because in the WWE, the “ugly”- I.e. not cosmetically enhanced, those girls are faces. It was “unconventional” looks that feuded with her. Which meant only the stereotypically “hot” cheerleader types were ever pushed as star baby faces. Meaning only they were pushed as role models.

Basically, we’ve ended up with a culture of only cheering on the “pretty” girls. Which I think, is utterly insane. And if this is the dynamic we follow to decide whom to support, where does it stop? Why bother having any “ugly chicks” around? And since that’s the case, why bother taking it seriously. Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with a little T & A on the shows. It certainly has it’s place, and it’s popular, so why not? But it should not be at the expense of actual wrestling. It should not be at the cost of ever being able to take women’s wrestling seriously. As a result, TNA’s “Knockouts” division could be crucial to redressing the balance for Wrestling fans.

Firstly, I would make it clear that “strip to Win”, “bikini”, and “bra and panties” matches have no place in the TNA’s women’s division. If they are to happen, present them as a separate gimmick bout, that has nothing to do with the title, or those competing for the gold. In fact, I would restrict it entirely to occurring between valets, and managers, not the female workers. Men don’t compete in those gimmicks, neither should the female workers. If it is a match to ever occur, I’m also talking about once or twice a year at most. It devalues the legitimacy of what they do. And once this happens, people do not take their matches seriously, and become bored too easily, they cannot buy into the “reality” of the contest.

They also need to only push the good workers. Gail Kim is super-hot, but if she suddenly decides she can’t be bothered wrestling well anymore, take her out of the picture. If her waist line expands… who cares? As long as she can wrestle, it doesn’t matter. Right now, the enormous Kong is a heel, largely thanks to her, err.. Largeness. But that’s fine, because her size and push is the same principle as to why men are pushed as monster heels as well. Her size and dominance are what cause people to empathize with the baby faces. But at some point, she should be given a shot as a baby face herself, if she continues to produce believable, dramatic matches, in an attempt to redefine the average viewers concept of what a female interpretation of a “hero” should look like. Apart from this size issue, we can’t be seeing the WWE-women’s style slow motion matches. I’ve already praised Trish Stratus. But it should be said that it took her an extremely long time, and lots of practice to be able to do things as simple as running the ropes. It’s a problem with many of the women. It just won’t do to have Torrie Wilson types lighting bouncing off the ropes and nervously ducking clotheslines, always looking as if they are worried their opponent needs extra time to choreograph the moves. It doesn’t work like that in men’s wrestling, and it shouldn’t for the women either.

Sign Sara Del Rey. I don’t know if she’s been approached, or she wants to go, or can go. Whatever, it doesn’t matter. If she can be signed, they need to get her. I personally, and selfishly don’t want to see this happen, purely from the point of view that I follow Shimmer: Women’s wrestling, and do not want to lose the company’s best performer. She’s also my favourite personally, and I think it would be a blow to the Shimmer product. But from TNA’s POV, she would be an invaluable player, and one who can not just work, work as well as any of the men, but she can work matches that are better than a huge percentage of TNA’s other stars.

The TNA creative team also need to put effort in having actual logic behind the division. A food-chain, and reasons for people fighting. Not every woman is or should be liable for a title shot. They need patience and build-up. Fundamentals that the WWE has never seen fit for the women! They also have to provide the female workers with enough time in their matches, and promote them accordingly. Gail Kim is defending the title against Kong in three weeks? Okay, build it up and present it as one of the top matches on the show. Give it a video package, and allow them to work a proper 15 minute match. They can’t do that? Well they shouldn’t be in that spot. TNA needs to ensure the women’s division is given it’s rightful place, and have the correct persons in the right places.

Right now, they’ve done okay. But they need to build on it. They can’t have random matches, with the average workers. What will really blow away jaded, narrow-minded male viewers, is great matches. When I first discovered Shimmer, it was because I wanted to give something that I saw as having noble intentions, a shot. And I did, and was rewarded with a good overall product, and some fantastic in-ring stuff. I was already familiar with some of the performers but not all. In Mercedes Martinez vs. Sara Del Rey, I was treated to a strong-style women’s match that blow away the majority of action you see in TNA. It wasn’t just good “for women’s wrestling”, it was good wrestling, period. And this is the distinction TNA will need to make to be truly successful in changing people’s views.

As for how it is, I can’t blame Vince, or any other promoters either. It’s my fault, and it’s the fault of all of you as well. See, the Diva search we bitch about? Well it (generally) gets good ratings, presumably from horny 16 year olds. And while many people cite Edge’s title win a couple years back as being proof of how a fresh face on top picked up ratings, they did spike to their highest during the segment in which he promised “live sex” between him and Lita. If we didn’t watch this crap, they wouldn’t bother giving it to us. Don’t teenage Americans know where to find porn?

I think it’s deeply important that we all make an effort to actually appreciate women’s wrestling in the same light in which we view the men. If it’s good, we watch. If not, then don’t. But don’t cheer the girls who have the biggest implants and turn the channel when Amazing/Awesome Kong is working. If that’s the case, bugger off , this is supposed to be wrestling. For me, if two women in the ring, are producing matches that are of the same quality as two men, then they deserve the same respect, and the same opportunities. If TNA do there part, I hope we can too.

I’m knackered. My head’s swirling and I feel like this rant is never ending. If you have any thoughts or opinions on the matter, let me know at bazilalfonso@hotmail.com and I will follow the column up. I NEED your insights and opinions. Do you believe Women’s wrestling can be a valuable part of a wrestling show, TNA’s in particular? Do you think I’m completely off the mark? Tell me and I’ll address your thoughts in a Cynical view follow up. Thanks for reading!!!